The Aryan-American’s chagrined embarrassment: The sentimental fallacy and criminal inconsistencies of the extreme Right Wing

by on April 21st, 2005

Ann Coulter, a 44 year old thinly curved blonde, is the conservative right-wing’s most strident mouthpiece. Piecing in radical interpretation of homespun values with xenophobic hypertension; her rough garment of polemic invokes the image of the moisturized skin of an ill-tempered transvestite soaking under a burlap dress after a hard night’s work.

“Coulter actually favors discrimination based on skin color in airports. She argues that airports should establish a separate line for men and boys whose complexion suggests they could be from the Middle East; they would be screened more thoroughly than other passengers.” observes John Cloud, TIME writer.

“Basically,” she says breezily, “aged 15 to 45—12 to 45, say.”Swarthy men … We’d be searching, you know, Italians, Spanish, Jews, males—but you’re excluding the women. You’re excluding the old people. You’re excluding American blacks.”

Vanity Fair’s Wolcott has called Coulter “the Paris Hilton of postmodern politics”; TIME’s own Andrew Sullivan has called her a “huckster of ideological hate” on his blog.

August Kreis, a bloated, pink, bespectacled, flabby faced, dark haired 40 something male sporting a black beret and a long beard, heralds himself as the new head of the self-proclaimed “Aryan Nations”: A community of folks whose aim is to unite all white men under the irony of the Swastika banner in a trailer park for an all day beer spree on a balmy day.

“You say they’re terrorists, I say they’re freedom fighters. And I want to instill the same jihadic feeling in our peoples’ heart, in the Aryan race, that they have for their father, who they call Allah.” says Kreis in reference to the Al-Qaeda.

“Kreis wants to make common cause with al Qaeda because, he says, they share the same enemies: Jews and the American government. The terms they use may be different: White supremacists call them ZOG, the Zionist Occupation Government, while al Qaeda calls them the Jews and Crusaders. But the hatred is the same. And Kreis wants to exploit that.” reports CNN reporter Henry Schuster.

While, Ann Coulter imparts the propaganda image of an SS-Man employed in the processing capacities of the “relocation” camps of Dachau or Mathausen, without the High German accent, and the delicate appreciation of Wagner; August Kreis embodies the poster boy of Anglo-Saxon rebellion against the olive-skinned might of Rome in the days of the yore. One can easily transpose him along the forested hinterlands of the Rhine in a pair of XXL plaid pajamas, swiveling an Axe with bare-chested berserkness, donning a spiked hide helmet instead of the familiar beret.

Ladies and Gentlemen, Aryan men and women, these are the protectors of your dimming torch: a pink fat motorbike boy, and a blonde manly girl. Boy, how the world have changed since our ancestors trailed out of North East Africa, on a long intercontinental trek through Persia, the Caucasus, North India, North China, and deep into the modern European heartland.

Through this mighty sojourn, the Aryan created civilizations across the East, creating the magnificent wonders of Indo-Aryan architecture in North-West India, the sprawling cityscapes of Persia, Mesopotamia, and the Babylon, developing high culture, poetry, wine, music, and cities. In the Mediterranean they created government, and cultivated logic. In the far West towards Scandinavia, they hibernated as the Eastern Aryans observed their stagnation with disinterest, till the great age of machines dawned upon them and made them the rulers of the world they are today.

It is easy and oversimplified to plainly accuse Ann Coulter and August Kreis of ignorance. They have things to say, and Democracy coerces us to listen. Democracy permits us to examine the psychology of loudness and treat its volume control apparatus, hoping the logic of good government will perform the duty of a good shrink and set things straight through its muscular legislative, judiciary, and executive tentacles, like some anthropomorphic Goddess of Eastern Mythology.

Taking the course of reason, information, and democracy, allow me to refresh those amongst you that have forgotten what the word Aryan means. Allow me to simplify instead of oversimplify.

According to Wikipedia, “Aryan is an English word derived from the Vedic Sanskrit and Avestan term arya, meaning “noble” or “lord”. In the 19th century, the term was often used to refer to what we now call the Proto-Indo-Europeans. Aryan currently refers to the Indo-Iranian language sub-family, or to its Indian sub-branch known as Indo-Aryan. The Aryan (Indo-Iranian) proto-language evolved into the family of Indo-Iranian languages and European languages, of which the oldest known members are Sanskrit and Avestan (and the fragmentary Mitanni language).

“Many Aryan religious beliefs and practices survived in Zoroastrianism (Iran), and Hindu (India). The term has also been used to refer to a “race”, originally in the loose sense of a distinct population. Ancient writers such as Herodotus described the Persians, the Medes, and the Scythians as some of the ancient Aryan peoples. 19th century writers used it as name for Indo-Europeans peoples as a whole. It also describes the people who invaded ancient India and conquered the Harappans/Dravidians, to become the Hindu people.”

In this encyclopedia description the types of olive skin hating girls like Ann Coulter, and the beret sporting fat men like August Kreis are conspicuously missing.

Nowhere in the chronicle of the Aryan people is there the mention, save the acceptance, of the North European as the progenitor of Aryan Science and Culture. In fact, history counterbalances any claim of North European superiority that Ann Coulter subliminally implies, and August Kreis outright bleats.

North Europeans in fact have possessed an ancestral obsession with the East. They launched nine crusades, majority of which were unsuccessful, including one in which they shipped Christian children in 1212, in an abhorrent display of the most backward moral and logical reasoning conceivable of an Aryan people.

Great Britain, a little island along the coastline of France, celebrated its short lived might, not by commemorating its history of blue-bodied Barbarism, but by exhorting to the English the image of the Roman and the Greek: an olive-skinned people that despised the backwardness of the Anglo-Saxon: as their founding father!

Britannia, the symbol of Britain’s pride, is suspiciously Greek in attire, sporting a Greek looking helmet, a phalanx spear, and a shield: closer to the image of Goddess Athena than to that of Queen Boudicca.

The Aryans of the East never reciprocated that fierce interest. They were content with their sway over the Mediterranean and Asia, and viewed the North European as hopeless, just as North Europeans today view the third world and the contested Middle East as hopeless.

When an Aryan with an American allegiance views the type of Ann Coulter and August Kreis, his olive skin singes with irritation, his athletic built boils with aggression, and his confidence and self-awareness in civilization feels threatened from within.

As a North Indian with Persian blood, the types of August Kreis enrages my bowels with visceral repugnance, and Ann Coulter’s skanky Aryan pretensions instills in me a resolve to stifle. It is then, that I am reminded that foremost I am an American, and that in itself procures a reserve of tolerance for the shrill and ugly bleating of these inferior and uncultured pretenders; a tolerance that perhaps would not have been found in the angered will of the Aryan. For as long as I am an American, I shall not decapitate the offender of my blood. The sword of Aryan justice remains tidily tucked away under the ‘nostalgia section’ of the attic.

Alexander Rai